Ask the Counselor . . .
Wed, 03/05/2014 - 17:58 Edgar
BY SUSAN LAUTZ. LPC.
My husband just confessed to me that he was molested as a child by an older boy. I would like to think that he did this because he trusts me, but I feel like it is in response to our frequent fights about sex. All my friend tell me their husbands are all over them, but in our marriage, nothing happens unless I start it. And sometimes not even then. Is this a normal reaction for someone who has been abused? How should I handle this?
There are a lot of particulars missing from your letter such as how old your husband was at the time, how often the abuse took place and just who this older boy was. ALL molestation is traumatic, but it can be even worse depending on the circumstances. For example, was this just once, or did it go on for years? Was the boy a member of the family? Did your husband tell anyone at the time and if so, how was the situation handled?